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healing through blogging…

I found two emails the other day in my spam box. A reply to that person is on the To Do list, but I’ve been a bit busy lately. So, I’m glad that you commented earlier and I promise a reply in the next day or two.

The move went alright. My “help” was great, arriving on time, loading everything in a fast and efficient manner. I’ve been pretty lucky, in all my moves, to have minimal damage, but my mirror broke today and it makes me very sad. I loved that mirror, it was older than me and it’s been with me everyday of my life. But, on the positive note, it could have been worse, the mirror can be replaced. At least the frame didn’t break.*

Anyways, we all just finished dinner and the help just left for home. Now I have two big tasks ahead of me.

  1. I have to get settled in here, right away. Today was shot for getting any work done. Tomorrow will be organization for at least part of it.
  2. Tonight, I have to go back and get the one thing I forgot to grab as I ran out the door. That sucks, because I don’t want to fight anymore. There’s been enough screaming and yelling for one day and I’m tired. I’m scared that if I don’t go back and get it tonight, I’ll have to do it tomorrow. And I really want to start tomorrow fresh, after much needed sleep. I need some peace. So, I’ll go tonight; if there’s more screaming and yelling, let it be tonight.

I did want to say a big thank you to all who commented and made me smile today. It was a shitty day, it was full of angst and pain. I love those who were worried for me, and those who cared. And you all know that I’ll be there for you, if you should ever need support too.

I always maintain that this blog is my way of dealing with things. This is my way of working things out. It’s my way of receiving support and good vibes (because we all know how much I need it). I’ve held a lot in lately, and that’s why I’m sick. It’s like my head was spinning; a feeling I have never felt before. I’m glad that I opened the floodgates again, because it makes me feel better. The intention is to work through the negative to get to the positive again.

*My Mum would like the InnerNets to know that although she was the one holding the mirror when it cracked, she WAS NOT looking into it when it happened.

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3 Comments

  1. OMG, you are going through this, too!!? I’m so sorry to hear that I’m not the only one in pain. Four years? That must sting, but at least you can close that door and open a new one in time… I can’t wait to finally get through this.

    Was this something coming for a long time? Sorry, I’ll have to read back.

    Thanks for all the kind comments on my site. A big virtual hug goes out to you!

    I’ve blogrolled you finally!

  2. Vancouver says:

    I think you ought to unsensor your entries and write freely. It is your life and your reality and if you choose to blog it then what can the ex say about it? If you are being threatened or are fearful, then that’s a matter for the police. Exercise your freedom of expression, by not doing so, because of this insistence by your ex, you are a victim (I hate that word) of domestic violence.

    Hugs. Remember that God is with you always. You are never alone.

  3. Hope you got that good clean start you needed to get working today.

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